America's Got Talent Thread (pres. by Shryke and Geezer)

[Geezer]

Yeah, they really do not need any more comedians. These two were far and away the best from the onset, and it is so refreshing to see that america voted for both.

I'd say unless there is a big screw-up, this week's top 4 is a cut above and they should all be moving on.

[Shrykespeare]

Order for tonight's episode:

David "The Bullet" Smith
All That!
Ulysses
Joe Castillo
Sebastien "El Charro de Oro"
Eric Dittelman
William Close
Unity in Motion
Eric & Olivia
Lindsey Norton
Horse
Olate Dogs

Glad to see Olate Dogs in the pimp spot, though I worry that the positioning for Joe, Sebastien and William could hurt them, and benefit Horse.

[Geezer]

I am going to be following you tonight, I am just starting now. I will have the benefit of fast-forwarding commercials though!

[Shrykespeare]

David "The Bullet" Smith - Look, I can certainly appreciate the danger involved with this kind of act. It’s cool that he changed up the theme a little bit by shooting himself through a field goal from 40 yards out. But seriously… after you’ve seen him do it once, is the second (and third) time really that much more exciting? Only if he were to miss the net, I suppose, and you don’t really want that to happen.

All That! - Totally in synch, very entertaining. Probably not enough to move on on this night.

Ulysses - The very last of the ridiculous acts (if you don't count Horse). Not surprised he got X'ed out.

Joe Castillo - Wow. This guy is a MASTER. What he can do in 90 seconds is amazing. He so deserves to move on.

Sebastien "El Charro del Oro" - I recognized the song, it's a classic love song. It started really toned down, but damn, he closed like a pro.

Eric Dittelman - Holy shit, this guy! I loved the trick, I love the Deal or No Deal theme, I want him to move on!

William Close - What a night, and we're barely halfway through! Totally awesome, totally Vegas, and I didn't even mind the vocal.

Unity in Motion - Not bad, and they might have had a shot any other week. I liked it more than you did, but it won't be enough.

Eric & Olivia - I hate that song, but they made it palatable. You're right, though, there just isn't enough there. This truly is not the season for singers.

Lindsey Norton - She's so limber it's sick. She commands the stage, and I love her to death. Too bad this is her swan song. I hope she goes on SYTYCD in a couple of years when she's old enough.

Horse - Pure, unadulterated crap. Serve him right if something ruptured and he died. I wonder what happens the day his little boy decides to emulate him and ends up in the pediatric ward.

Olate Dogs - Damn. These guys blow that dog that won BGT away. Just amazing. What a great night!



At this point, I have to hope and pray that the acts going through are Joe, Eric, William and Olate Dogs. At this rate, we may see three or four other acts from tonight on the Wild Card show.

[Geezer]

David "The Bullet" Smith - I can't stand this stupid act that lasts a minute and a half. What would he do for the rest of his show? Like I said, it's just falling with style.

All That! - Honestly they might be the BEST traditional dance group I have seen on this show. They were fantastic tonight.

Ulysses - I don't think the whole production suits him. He's better just singing and trying to be funny. It didn't work unfortunately. It was still a little funny but not as much as before. But he never ever had a chance. Like Howie said, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Joe Castillo - He is amazing. He creates magic. I could watch him for an hour. He suffers from needing to do it so fast. If he had an hour to convey all of his art, it would be even more spectacular. I really hope he goes on. It is so Silhouettes-esque.

Sebastien "El Charro de Oro" - When he reaches for it and brings his voice, he can really sing, but this song really didn't show it off for me. He didn't really command it. I dunno, I didn't like it. I hope he goes home. Howie compared him to Jackie Evancho and that is simply insane.

Eric Dittelman - Oh my God he is AMAZING!!!! He needs a show in Vegas TOMORROW! Holy shit dude if he goes home I'm never watching this show again.

William Close - Ya know what would make this act better? If the singer would have never opened his mouth. His instrument is fantastic, why bring a guy who can't really sing into it? The rest of the act is great. Howie says he won, but I'm not willing to go that far. But he definitely should go through.

Unity in Motion - Meh. I was bored. No "WOW" moment. They are on a very difficult night and they were just not up to snuff. They are going home. Boring.

Eric & Olivia - I would have buzzed them. On a night like this, you can't bring this mediocre junk. See ya later.

Lindsey Norton - She is fantastic, but I think she's at a huge disadvantage tonight. I loved her, but she's got ZERO chance among this group.

Horse - Unfortunately I thought his pre-show clip was funnier than his act, but it still made me laugh my ass off. He's great at what he does. He's got no chance of going through, but I like him.

Olate Dogs - How do you teach dogs to do this? They are SO GOOD! How does a dog learn to backflip?? Holy crap this show is great tonight.

It is impossible to call. At least 6 seriously deserving acts. I'd say Dittleman, Olate Dogs, William Close and Joe Castillo. But really, who knows? I hope All That! and Lindsey can score Wild Card spots, and I bet Unity in Motion gets a WC spot from Howard. Sebastian could get one too. Incredible night.

[Geezer]

They were saying on twitter that tonight is the best show ever, and I have to say, it might be, but I still think it is top-heavy.

[Shrykespeare]

So as anticipated, Olate Dogs, William Close and Joe Castillo moved through on viewer votes, and Eric Dittelman got the nod over All That! from the judges.

Sucks that so many acts performed well but couldn't advance.

So now, let's review who made it.

Four musical acts: Edon, Tim Hockenberry, Maurice & Shanice Hayes and William Close
Three dance acts: Turf, The Scott Brothers and the Untouchables.
Two comedians: Tom Cotter and Jacob Williams
Three "artistic acts": Joe Castillo, David Garibaldi & his CMYKs and Light Wire Theater
Two danger acts: Donovan & Rebecca and All Wheel Sports
One magic act: Eric Dittelman
One animal act: Olate Dogs


So now, Geez, let's speculate about who might be back for the Wild Card show. Who would you bring back?


Male Singers:
Definitely Andrew De Leon, possibly Jake Wesley Rogers.

Female Singers:
I figure it'll either be Mary Joyner or Danielle Stallings. No way they'll bring both back.

Solo Dancers:
I wouldn't be surprised if we saw Lindsey Norton again, but they could also choose to bring Stepz back.

Dance Crews:
All That! for sure (in fact, Sharon already announced that they're her first pick). Unity in Motion, Inspire the Fire and 787 Crew have an outside shot, but I hope they don't come back.

Magic acts:
I figure it'll either be Hawley Magic or Spencer Horsman, definitely not both.

Child acts:
Probably Sebastien, possibly that little six-year-old MJ (what was his name... oh yeah... Isaac Brown).

Danger acts:
I'd love to see Cristin Sandu again, possibly Ben Blaque. Since AWS made it through, the BMX team won't be there.

Comedians:
If they pick anyone, it'll be Todd Oliver and his dog, because they came so close before.

Bands:
Wordspit and the Illest. No one else deserves a spot.

[Geezer]

The 4 I picked went through, and my "next best" act was 5th and Sharon already handed them their WC spot, so that makes me feel great.

The WC show will be fantastic. I hate that we have to wait another 4 weeks for it.

I think the 12 spots, if I were handing them out:

All That! (already a guarantee)
Andrew De Leon
Lindsey Norton
Wordspit and the Illest
Cristin Sandu
Spencer Horseman
Danielle Stallings
Jake Wesley Rogers
Stepz
Hawley Magic
Sebastian
Mary Joyner

But I know there's no way I nail all twelve, and I know that Howie will bring back at least one stupid act that he loves and no one else does. They also will probably bring back an act that we didn't even think about that didn't get past Vegas. They also almost have to bring back the guy with the ventriloquist dog unfortunately. It will be a great show. And if I had to pick a top 4 from this group, I'd go with Andrew De Leon, Wordspit and the Illest, Cristin Sandu (provded he doesn't blow it again) and either All That!, Spencer Horseman or Jake Wesley Rogers, whoever gives the best performance.

[Shrykespeare]

Well, after a two-week break, AGT will be back tonight. Thank God, my Jones for this show is getting unbearable!

I checked both the Wikipedia page and the NBC website for information on tonight's ep, and found out the identities of the YouTube acts that made the cut, as well as the order they will ostensibly be performing in. (I tried looking for their auditions on YouTube, but couldn't find them.) They are:

7 in Unison - a dance group made up of seven girls (ages 14-15) from Orange County, CA. They have won national titles, including the World Dance Championships. Which means they'd better be good.

Reverse Order - a band consisting of four brothers from Hackettstown, New Jersey. They want to bring "uplifting music" to the country, which makes me worry that it's going to be schmaltzy.

Drew Irwin - a singer/musician and high school student from Memphis. Apparently his parents filmed him performing and submitted his audition video without him knowing, and he didn't find out he was on the show until the producers called him. And not only that, he got more votes than any other auditioner. Can't wait to hear him.

Bria Kelly - a 16-year-old singer/guitarist from Virginia Beach. She has been engaged to perform the national anthem more than 40 times, writes her own songs and has opened for numerous well-known country bands.

Cast in Bronze - This is a weird one. Clad in a black complete-body coverall and a bronze mask, he is a musician that plays the carillon, an instrument consisting of 35 bronze bells. Definitely a long shot.

Romeo Dance Cheetah - The AGT website says he is a musician, whose stage name reflects his "fast, passionate, strong and agile musical style"... but Wikipedia has him listed as an "air guitarist". Which if that's the case, fuck no.

Melinda Hill - a stand-up comedian from L.A. She has appeared on numerous TV shows and currently hosts a podcast with author Jillian Lauren called "Eat My Podcast". Question.... what is a "podcast"?

Eric Buss - a entertainer from Tuscon, AZ who uses homemade inventions and artistry in his act (a la Carrot Top).

The Magic of Puck - a stage magician from NY. A salty veteran, he has been performing for four decades in venues like cruise ships and corporate events. Hope he's good.

Academy of Villains - a 24-strong dance troup from San Francisco. They were crowned USA Champions in the hip-hop category earlier this year.

Clint Carvalho and his Extreme Parrots - a talking bird act out of Honolulu. Not a chance this goes through, even if it's good.

Rudy Coby - an L.A.-based magician whose "creations leave audiences feel as though they stepped into an animated comic book". He's got a rock-star image: dark glasses, leather jacket, punk-rock hairstyle. Easily the most intriguing act on paper.

[Shrykespeare]

Well, I knew going in that most of tonight's show was going to suck. Ten X's were doled out, which is one fewer than the number of X's given in the first four weeks combined.

I think it's only because of Jackie Evancho that this part of the show still exists. There is no way they will ever find anyone of her caliber again. Not one of the four YouTube acts from last season made it to the Top 10, and I don't expect any of these acts to either.


Clint Carvalho and his Extreme Parrots - I must say, it's quite impressive to train a bird to fly that far, from outside to inside, from a distance. I know birds have exceptional hearing, but could the bird have possibly heard Clint calling from that far away? Not bad.

Reverse Order - Why do all these bands sing girl songs? "I Kissed a Girl" just doesn't sound the same coming out of a dude's mouth. They weren't bad, but I doubt I'll remember them.

Rudy Coby - All sizzle, no steak, and barely any sizzle. The trick was pointless and boring, the pacing sucked, the musical accompaniment sucked, and I would have X'd him too.

7 in Unison - Yawn. Another teenage dance group that I won't remember the day after.

Drew Irwin - Not bad, but Howard was right, he's not ready for this. I'm guessing he was the top voter because he's cute more than talented. A couple more years, and he'll be ready, if he applies himself.

Melinda Hill - I'm so happy we have two GOOD comedians in the semis already. This was awful.

Eric Buss - This isn't Vegas. It isn't even Sheboygan.

Romeo Dance Cheetah - Airpocalypse from a few seasons ago were the fucking Who compared to this jagoff.

The Magic of Puck - On a night when it was not about who was the best but about who sucked the least, Puck was good. He needs to be much, much better next time, though.

Bria Kelly - Far and away the best act of the night. In a season that's had such a dearth of great female singers, she was welcome.

Cast in Bronze - William Close has softened me up when it comes to unusual musical instruments, and I can appreciate the talent it takes to play an instrument this complex. However, I'd probably like it so much more if the guy wasn't such a fucking weirdo.

Academy of Villains - great name, great music, great costumes, great makeup, and easily the only act tonight with a shot at Top Ten.

[Geezer]

Shryke, you really don't know what a podcast is? It is a radio show that exists online. Instead of being a live broadcast, they are pre-recorded, then uploaded to the web, so one can listen to them at any time.

[Geezer]

Clint Carvalho and his Extreme Parrots - That was cool. But that is just the first minute of his act, what does he do next? This is an introduction, what is the show?

Reverse Order - Absolutely nothing original or cool about this. They are your very typical (and bad) high school garage band that you'd find in any town in America. How are they on this stage?

Rudy Coby - Wow was there a lot of nothing to get to a very mediocre trick. He sucked.

7 in Unison - So I forgot to critique this group. Probably because they were so boring, unmemorable, and the lighting was so bad I could barely see them.

Drew Erwin - I agree with Howard. He was very green and it is not his time. He ended strong but the beginning and middle were very mediocre.

Melinda Hill - Wow, this is how you do dreadful comedy. Completely miserable. Not a single joke landed.

Eric Buss - This is quite possibly the worst act I have ever seen on this show. And that is saying a lot.

Romeo Dance Cheetah - The world's best air guitarist isn't as talented as the world's worst guitarist. No way.

The Magic of Puck - What the judges said. Everyone else has sucked, so he looks great by comparison. It's not the magic we are used to, and it wasn't that great, but on a night like tonight, he will absolutely go through and I'm actually looking forward to where he goes next.

Bria Kelly - Thank fucking God. We finally have an act worthy of this show. The first one who can stand up there with some of the best we've seen this season. And with the dreadful female singing crop this year, she's got a great shot.

Cast in Bronze - Very very strange, and certainly not worth a million dollars.

[Geezer]

Academy of Villains - THE BEST ACT OF THE NIGHT BY FAR. Hell, possibly the best dance act of the entire season. Absolutely going through and one of my new favorites. Loved it

So all in all, it sucked as it usually does. I think going on are Academy of Villains, Bria Kelly, The Magic of Puck, and either the 16 year old guy or the Parrot.

[Shrykespeare]

For the four going through, I echo your picks exactly.

[Geezer]

I really hope they do away with this next year. I would MUCH rather see a second Wild Card show than this. They would have a much easier time finding 24 worthy acts from what we've already seen than 12 from the Youtube disaster. My girlfriend actually voted on the Youtube auditions and she said one of the female singers was easily the best, and they didn't even put her through to the show.